How to choose a retreat you will actually enjoy

Retreats fail for boringly predictable reasons, and all of them are visible in the schedule before you book.

First question: how much unstructured time is there? A week with two classes a day and a free afternoon is a rest. A week with two classes, a workshop, a talk and a group dinner is a conference with better views.

Second question: how many people? Under sixteen and you will know everyone by day three. Over thirty and you will be in a group that is managed rather than taught. Neither is wrong, but they are completely different weeks.

Third question: is silence involved, and is it optional? Partial silence — mornings only, or meals only — is a very different commitment from ten days of the real thing. Retreats that are vague about this are usually vague in person too.

Two smaller things that matter more than people expect: whether rooms are shared, and how far it is from the airport. A four-hour transfer at the end of a long-haul flight eats the first day and a half.

And book your first retreat close to home. If it turns out not to suit you, a three-hour train back is a very different situation from a rebooked international flight.